Part of the reason people have difficulty communicating is that most are unaware of the logical fallacies they and others commit. This Link is a good introduction to fallacies in general. You can also find other articles there on each specific fallacy (e.g. Ad Hominem).
Ad Hominem is probably one of the more common. When a person makes a point and the other person responds by questioning the first one's motivation, attitude, background, intelligence, or expertise, that is an ad hominem fallacy. Instead, the second person should address the issues or points and provide counter-arguments. Example: A says "These studies show women are as intelligent as men". B says "You only say that because you hate me for being a man." B should have questioned the studies instead of aiming at A's motivation.
Another is guilt by association. For example, "Liberals and subversives believe women are equal to men. Egalitarians believe women are equal to men. Therefore egalitarians are liberals and subversives".
A good exercise would be to go through some of the conversations here and see if you can spot the logical fallacies that shut down communication. But of course, don't take those findings and commit more fallacies by attacking the people who use them (which is probably everybody). Try only looking at your own posts so you can see your own areas needing improvement.
Added: Another great site is Christian Logic.
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Adj. Pertaining to complementarianism and egalitarianism.